Tuesday, February 28, 2006
not much to say these days…
Between not watching news and not visiting religious forums anymore, there’s not much I feel ranting about. Then I’m busy with too many other things, some of which are geeky pursuits and some of which are quite mundane.
I discovered a fun series on Netflix, though: Dead Like Me. I’m already annoyed that the series didn’t make it past two seasons. All the crap I couldn’t care less about runs for decades, but the stuff that I enjoy doesn’t last very long.
Saturday, February 25, 2006
Hunting Lawyers
(No offense intended to any actual lawyers, living or dead, who might be frequenting this site ...)
From: Frederick Clegg
Date: February 16, 2006 11:45:50 PM EST
This is according to the TPWD and the Dallas Bar Association. But I think we should run it past Marsha Gillespe to see what the Game Wardens have to say about it: (note that no aggregate limits are posted)
ATTORNEY HUNTING GUIDE
1.) Any person with a valid Texas hunting license may harvest attorneys.
2.) The taking of attorneys with traps or deadfalls is permitted. The use of currency as bait is prohibited.
3.) The killing of attorneys with a vehicle is prohibited. If accidentally struck, remove roadkill to roadside, then proceed to nearest car wash.
4.) It is unlawful to chase, herd, or harvest attorneys from a helicopter or
other aircraft.
5.) It shall be unlawful to shout, “whiplash,” “ambulance!” or, “Free Liquor!” for the purposes of trapping attorneys.
6.) It shall be unlawful to use controlled substances, single malt scotch, $100 bills, prostitutes, or vehicle accidents to attract attorneys.
7.) It shall be unlawful to hunt attorneys within 200 yards of whorehouses, cardiac rehab centers, ambulances, hospitals or bars across from the courthouse.
8.) If an attorney is elected to government office, there will be a $500 bounty on the pelt.
9.) Stuffed or mounted attorneys must have a state health department inspection for rabies, vermin and contagious diseases.
10.) It shall be illegal for a hunter to disguise himself as a reporter, drug dealer, pimp, female law clerk, sheep, accident victim, bookie, or tax accountant for the purposes of hunting attorneys.
Attorney Bag Limits:
Silverbacked Texas Millionaire = 1 (in possession)
Yellow-Bellied Sidewinder = 5
Hairless Civil Libertarian = 7
Skinny-Assed Ambulance Chaser = 12
Horse or Cattle Rustler Defender = 20
Silver-Tongued Murderer Defender = 50
Jack-Legged Divorce Litigator = No limit
Intellectual Property or intellectual anything = (rare)
protected species
Honest Attorney = Extinct
Friday, February 24, 2006
OpenWRT
After Geekmom put me up to it, I had her get me an old-model (version 3) Linksys WRT54GS wireless router. I wish that particular hardware revision would still be available in retail, because it’s a very convenient platform to put your own version of Linux on, like the OpenWRT distribution. I have a few more things to configure, but I hope to be able to replace my noisy Linux firewall and a wireless access point with a single low-power gadget.
Happy happy joy joy :-D
This is so much fun. Even better, there are even cheaper gadgets like one brand of Motorola wireless routers to achieve the same end. I may just get one, install it at my in-laws, and simplify our tech support situation by running an on-demand VPN to their place.
Wednesday, February 22, 2006
I think I found my intellectual twin
My twin recounted this story which came to me via e-mail by someone that knows me.
Last weekend I saw something at Larry’s Pistol & Pawn Shop that sparked my interest. The occasion was our 22nd anniversary and I was looking for a little something extra for my wife Toni. What I came across was a 100,000-volt, pocket/purse-sized taser. The effects of the taser were supposed to be shortlived, with no long-term adverse affect on your assailant, allowing her adequate time to retreat to
safety…. WAY TOO COOL!
Long story short, I bought the device and brought it home. I loaded two triple-a batteries in the darn thing and pushed the button. Nothing! I was disappointed. I learned, however, that if I pushed the button AND pressed it against a metal surface at the same time; I’d get the blue arch of electricity darting back and forth between the
prongs. Awesome!!! Unfortunately, I have yet to explain to Toni what that burn spot is on the face of her microwave.
Okay, so I was home alone with this new toy, thinking to myself that it couldn’t be all that bad with only two triple-a batteries, right?!!! There I sat in my recliner, my cat Gracie looking on intently (trusting little soul) while I was reading the directions and thinking that I really needed to try this thing out on a flesh & blood moving target. I must admit I thought about zapping Gracie (for a fraction of a second) and thought better of it. She is such a sweet cat.
But, if I was going to give this thing to my wife to protect herself against a mugger, I did want some assurance that it would work as advertised. Am I wrong? So, there I sat in a pair of shorts and a tank top with my reading glasses perched delicately on the bridge of my nose, directions in one hand, taser in another. The directions said that a one-second burst would shock and disorient your assailant; a two-second burst was supposed to cause muscle spasms and a major loss of bodily control; a three-second burst would purportedly make your assailant flop on the ground like a fish out of water. Any burst longer than three seconds would be wasting the batteries.
All the while I’m looking at this little device, measuring about 5” long, less than 3/4 inch in circumference; pretty cute really and loaded with two itsy, bitsy triple-a batteries, thinking to myself, “no possible way!” What happened next is almost beyond description, but I’ll do my
best…..
I’m sitting there alone, Gracie looking on with her head cocked to one side as to say, “don’t do it master,” reasoning that a one-second burst from such a tiny little ole thing couldn’t hurt all that bad. I decided to give myself a one-second burst just for the heck of it. I touched the prongs to my naked thigh, pushed the button, and
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!! I’m pretty sure
a monster ran in through the side door, picked me up in the recliner, then body slammed us both on the carpet, over and over and over again. I vaguely recall waking up on my side in the fetal position, with tears in my eyes, body soaking wet, both nipples on fire, testicles nowhere to be found, with my left arm tucked under my body in the oddest position, and tingling in my legs. The cat was standing over me making meowing sounds I had never heard before,
licking my face, undoubtedly thinking to herself, “do it again, do it again!”
Note: If you ever feel compelled to taser yourself one note of caution: there is no such thing as a one-second burst when you zap yourself. You will not let go of that thing
until it is dislodged from your hand by a violent thrashing about on the floor. A three second burst would be considered conservative. SON-OF-A-..... Man, that hurt!!!
A minute or so later (I can’t be sure, as time was a
relative thing at that point), I collected my wits (what little I had left), sat up and surveyed the landscape. My bent reading glasses were on the mantel of the fireplace. How did they up get there??? My triceps, right thigh and both nipples were still twitching. My face felt like it
had been shot up with Novocain, and my bottom lip weighed 88 lbs. I’m still looking for my testicles. I’m offering a significant reward for their safe return.
Still in shock,
Tommy
Sunday, February 19, 2006
I like this idea
At least one U.S. soldier has successfully sued his al-qaeda attacker. http://abcnews.go.com/US/wireStory?id=1637543
Morris cited news reports including interviews with his attacker’s immediate family indicating that Omar Khadr, then 15, had wounded him and killed Speer. The ruling, released Friday, cited similar evidence that the boy’s father, suspected financier Ahmad Sa’id Khadr, was linked to al-Qaida and trained his son to attack American targets.
Morris and Speer, who served with the 19th Special Forces, were attacked with grenades and automatic weapons in a remote Afghanistan village. Shrapnel severed the optic nerve in Morris’ right eye, blinding him.
Soldiers arrested the boy, who is being held at the U.S. detention center at Guantanamo Bay.
I’ve always thought that going after arab fundraisers and charities was excellent idea. I can’t think of a better way to to engender a little terror ourselves. There is nothing scarier than a bunch of money grubbing American trial lawyers that don’t have to abide by the Geneva Conventions.
Saturday, February 18, 2006
Don’t like biology move to AZ and object to the class
While getting caught up on things that are happening around the world, I happened upon this little tidbit. Arizona is considering the following bill:
Each university under the jurisdiction of the Arizona board of regents and each community college under the jurisdiction of a community college district shall adopt procedures by which students who object to any course, coursework, learning material or activity on the basis that it is personally offensive shall be provided without financial or academic penalty an alternative course, alternative coursework, alternative learning materials or alternative activity.
Objection to a course, coursework, learning material or activity on the basis that it is personally offensive includes objections that the course, coursework, learning material or activity conflicts with the student’s beliefs or practices in sex, morality or religion.
You have got to be kidding me. I agree that ignorance is bliss, but this is ridiculous.
Tuesday, February 14, 2006
time flies
I can’t believe that it’s gotten to the point where I can get through most of Valentine’s day without remembering that my mother died on Feb 14. It wasn’t until my sister mentioned it while we were talking on the phone a few minutes ago that I remembered at all. It’s been 20 years already ...
Then we got talking about how easy it is to remember the date when our dad died. The funeral director was taking us through some of the paperwork and telling us about how since he died on the first of the month, the estate would get his October pension check. And we had to tell the poor guy that he died 10 minutes before midnight, so the estate wouldn’t get that money. He seemed to be feeling a bit awkward about that, so we started joking with him about what we could have done to keep our dad alive for another 10 minutes ... I don’t think he was quite sure about whether or not he should laugh.
Any point to these ramblings? Nope. It’s just that Valentine’s day is a bit weird when it’s also the date on which a close relative dies ...
Sunday, February 12, 2006
About that Netflix outfit…
It seems like AP’s article about Netflix throttling “heavy users” is being widely distributed, like on CNN.
The comments on the Hacking Netflix site are interesting. You would think that wide dissemination of the AP story would hit their bottom line, but it wouldn’t surprise me if there was no significant backlash. Then again, I wonder how many of the Netflix “blame the victim, get a life” apologists are paid shills.
After paying for, but not using the service for a while and now seeing early signs of throttling, I’m starting to get a hot under the collar.
I’m not prepared to argue whether Netflix has covered their legal butts with the fine print they added to their terms of service, but even it they did, in my opinion they willfully engage in deceptive marketing - to put it mildly.
It looks like their business model does not include loss leaders; they apparently want to turn a profit on every single subscriber. Worse, once a customer is flagged as a heavy user, the throttling appears to remain in effect indefinitely. All of which sours me on Netflix. I don’t like to do business with a company that I’ve come to regard as dishonest, even if I’m otherwise satisfied with their service.
Whatever. Now that I know what to look for, Netflix is at risk of losing another customer.
Wednesday, February 08, 2006
From the “things i wished i’d thought of myself” department ...
I saw this as part of somebody’s sig on another forum and wish I’d thought of this one myself:
“What’s crappening?”
Just one of those little sh*t related things that I have such a taste for ... :þ
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